Reverse Awkwardness: Mom Edition

2 Apr

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There are rare moments in my life when I am not the most awkward person in the room.  Rarer still are the moments when someone else is being so awkward that it manages to make even me uncomfortable. Yeah…it happens. I call this phenomenon: reverse awkwardness.

I’ve blogged before about an instance of reverse awkwardness when on a date with a guy who insisted I get a colonic. But you can almost see that one coming because there is nothing more awkward then a first date.

So you can imagine my surprise when the person who put me in this situation for a second time was none other than my own beautiful and usually composed mother!

I had been dating my then boyfriend for about 6 months.  The boyfriend before him was… well… let’s just say he wasn’t very nice to me and leave it at that. So my family was very excited to hear that I was dating someone who was seemingly normal. SO excited was my mom, in fact, that she insisted we fly down to visit her.  Since she is charming and says everything in her beautiful little Spanish accent we naturally agreed.

Mom suggested the three of us go to dinner at my favorite Mexican restaurant. Everything seemed to be going well.  Mom liked Boyfriend.  Boyfriend liked mom.  And then…

I see my mom reach over and stab what was left of his burrito with her fork.

{What the hell is she doing?}

She then begins to cut a piece of his burrito and transfer it to her mouth all while maintaining a conversation about my strange obsession with the Italian mafia when I was 9 years old and how her and my father felt they had raised a really creepy kid.

{Stop talking & eating!} I willed with my mind, but she didn’t seem to notice. She just kept cutting away at his burrito.

{Boyfriend looks at me as if to say “do something!”}

 Stab“MA!”, I yelled.

Que?”, she asked with her fork hovering above his burrito.

“What are you DOING?”

{She responds with a questioning stare. Fork still hovering over his food}

“Stop eating his food!” I demanded.

“Oh! I am so eh-sorry, Boyfriend!” {continues to cut away at his burrito & take another bite while shaking her head in disbelief at her own behavior}

“MAMA! STOP EATING HIS FOOD!” {I wrestle her fork and knife away}

“OOOOOOOOHHHH MY GOO-NESS. How embarrass! I never do this. I don’t know que me pasa.”

Boyfriend turns to me, “I see now where you get it from”

What? No!! I don’t know what that was…

In the end, the relationship didn’t work out. Granted, he didn’t cite the above incident as a reason but it couldn’t have helped matters! So now my mom isn’t allowed to meet my boyfriends. Or if she does, it has to be on a full stomach! And she’s definitely  not allowed to mention what a creepy kid I was!!

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7 Responses to “Reverse Awkwardness: Mom Edition”

  1. saramo April 2, 2013 at 4:18 pm #

    LOL !!!!!

  2. Christina Iglesia April 3, 2013 at 1:30 am #

    Oh tia! hahahhahahahahha creepy kid hahahhahahahahahhahaha

  3. Project Southsea April 3, 2013 at 6:03 am #

    Another great story.

    They say the apple does not fall far from the tree, you having an awkward mother may explain a lot! 😉

    • awkwardcharm April 3, 2013 at 7:30 am #

      Aw thanks!

      Yes…they say that. But my mom isn’t usually awkward. Or maybe she hides it really well 😉 regardless she came out awkwards blazing on that day!

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. Strings Attached | Awkward Charm - August 30, 2013

    […] Thanks to incidents like these, all boyfriends are banned from meeting my family until after we’re […]

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